Life With ALS.com

+    Diagnosed Aug 2005

+     Bipap March 2007

+     PEG July 2007

+     Trache and Vent July 2008

Still Living, Loving & Laughing

This is a subject that comes up every now and then. It is a topic that people are reluctant to bring up but are thankful when someone else does. It is an important topic to discuss and people should not be embarrassed about it.

There are many things I have had to give up that were hard, like our house, boat and shop. It was hard to give up our houses, but as hard as that was my biggest loss has been the intimacy my wife and I used to share.

I can no longer put my arms around her and hold her tight. I am grateful that I can still tell her how much I love and appreciate her but the intimacy we used to enjoy is a distant memory.

On the ALS forums I frequent there has been talk about this and there are a lot of people who still enjoy intimacy. They have been creative and are not afraid to try different methods.

One misconception that needs to be discussed is you will not hurt your PALS by partaking in sex. There is nothing wrong with that part of their bodies or their ability to enjoy sex. It is actually been proven to be beneficial. So don’t be afraid to initiate it.

Another problem that seems to have a direct relation to lack of intimacy is the spouse/lover is now the primary caregiver and that seems to change everything. I don’t have any words of wisdom here. I know a few people who have somehow worked around this and continue to have a healthy sex life. I am happy for them.

Don’t be afraid to love and be intimate.